Stranger Things
Nancy Wheeler
She follows the evidence after everyone else has decided the story is over. I return to her refusal to be dismissed, and to the courage of making attention an action.
I trust less in talent than in the work I am willing to do.
我不自信于我的天赋，但自信于我的勤奋。
hello
A longer introduction
Written in both languages, because I think in both.
Hi, I'm Huiru Feng. You can call me Sophia. I'm reading Mathematics at UCL.
I like to record things, and I like to make them. This site holds my projects, my reading, my research and my journal. I would rather it were not a static CV but a window onto something still growing. What I understand as intelligence is asking why anything, a result or a feeling, came to be at all. So I like walking into fields I know nothing about, and slowly taking the complexity apart until it has a shape I can hold. At the moment that field is machine learning.
What I have wanted for a long time is autonomy: to be able to decide where I live, what I study and who I walk beside. My ambition has always been in service of one sentence, "wow, that's cool." It is also why I would rather wait than settle. The lifelong version of that wish is to leave something behind, for what I do and what I think to be of some use to someone.
I did consider putting my MBTI on the homepage, then decided it was too much like a label. I would rather show the different dimensions as they come: a woman of this generation, still on the way, and brave enough for it.
Reading, film and television, podcasts, travel, sport and the stubborn parts of academic work are what I love. What I want most is a deep talk with the people my soul resonates with.
嗨，我叫冯绘如，你也可以叫我 Sophia，目前在 UCL 数学系。
我很喜欢记录和创造。这个网站收藏了我的项目、阅读记录、科研经历与 journal。我希望它不是一份静止的简历，而是一个持续生长的窗口。我理解的智慧，是去思考一切事物与情绪为何产生，所以我喜欢进入完全陌生的领域，慢慢把复杂拆解成自己的结构。目前正在探索机器学习相关的课题。
长久以来我追求的都是自主权。我的野心总是为了那一句“哇好酷！”，为了有能力决定自己在哪里生活、研究什么、与谁同行。所以可以用“宁缺毋滥”四个字，来概括我作为长期主义者的生活态度。当然，毕生的理想还是想为这个世界留下些什么，希望我的所做与所想，能在某种程度上帮到一些人。
曾想过要不要在主页写上 MBTI，最后还是觉得那太标签化了。我更想把不同维度的自己呈现出来，做一个一直在路上、足够勇敢的新时代女性。
阅读、影视、播客、旅行、运动、钻研学术，都是我喜欢做的事。我渴望与能够灵魂共振的人 deep talk。
four directions
Women I return to
Not because I think I am them. Because each of them keeps one light on in a direction I want to recognise.
The Silence of the Lambs
Clarice Starling · Jodie Foster
She stays observant inside rooms designed to unsettle her. I return to her restraint: intelligence without theatre, empathy without surrendering judgement.
野狗骨头
苗靖 · Miao Jing
She is gentle without being easily bent, and stubborn enough to keep her own shape. I return to the strength that does not need to announce itself.
太阳的后裔
姜暮烟 · Kang Mo-yeon
She carries expertise into uncertainty and keeps tenderness beside professional judgement. I return to a woman who can care deeply without making herself smaller.
They are not a definition, only coordinates: four ways of remaining awake to the world.